As I sat at home, trying to come up with a video report to share with you, the loyal Movie Magazine audience, I began to have some weird thoughts. Thoughts like, "Gee, I wonder if people are gonna think strange things about me based on what movies I actually go out and rent". Well, ponder away, friends, because this week I'm going to share my thoughts about a classic direct-to-video pick. Produced by those always caring, nurturing folks at Full Moon Entertainment, "Dark Angel:The Ascent" is the most fun I've had with my VCR since....well, never you mind.
Angela Featherstone is the star of this masterpiece of high brow, low budget joy, and she plays a young she-demon who's become bored with her job. You see, she's a torturer of the pit, punishing the wicked as part of some holy plan. One day, she grows restless, and decides to sneak out the "Hole in Hell's Fence" and make her way in the world of men.
When she arrives, the first guy she encounters is an extremely nice emergency room doctor. He's the kind of guy who fights for the rights of his patients, even though the penny pinching hospital administration just wants his work under budget. When our she-devil gets a gander at him, she sinks her little demon claws in, and they move in together. What ensues is, to put it mildly, what great cinema is all about.
I mean, we're talkin' award winning, poetic material that could bring a tear to any sensitive person's eye. There's the "vigilante eats her victim, and then cooks it up for the boyfriend" scene. And the "demon horns pop out during sex" scene. And the "take your filthy harlot hands off my man" scene in the disco, that gives new meaning to the term, "cat-fight". Yes, "Dark Angel: The Ascent" takes you on a voyage of discovery that might teach you something very interesting about yourself. Now, I suppose you could choose not to take my "feeble" opinion. You could rent another one of those disposable "popular" movies, and forget you ever heard this. Ah, but you can't forget, can you? No, the "demon seed" has been planted. You probably won't rent "Dark Angel: The Ascent" this week. Or next week. But you will. Oh yes, you will.
Copyright 1995 John A. Lavin
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